Fifty-two months ago Adrienne had a hysterectomy. We have seen four Mother’s and Father’s Days since the decision. Each one is easier than the previous however for some reason this Father’s day was more melancholy for me than the previous. The first Mother’s Day Adrienne wrote
There is no I-had-my-uterus-and-ovaries-taken-at-32-so-I-will-never-have-children-of-my-own day. If someone makes one, I hope it’s in August. I don’t have anything else to celebrate in August.
The name isn’t catchy, the sentiment too raw, and it risks emphasizing our infertility. Whatever it is named, we observe that day on August 11th. I originally posted a request to our friends in this blog in 2010 where I detail objectives of the day. We receive a nice response each year.
Most of the time we are okay. Every once in a while emotion overwhelms us. 2013 has been pretty good, evidenced by the sparse blog updates on the subject. (Read most of the saga there.) Thank you to all our friends sending Adie well-wishes yesterday. It really means a lot to the both of us. We spent the day playing video games then went to a private restaurant industry party, kind of a typical day off for us.
I am thankful that Adie & I survived the crucible. Through the moments of weakness, flaring rage and years of emotional strife we built an unshakable relationship that continues to broaden and deepen. With all we have been through I am profoundly grateful for this relationship borne partly from hardship.
To end this post I want to invite curious readers to ask me about the experience. I feel compelled to talk about it, however the subject rarely surfaces and most people awkwardly change the subject. Engage me if you are going through something similar and want to talk, or just want to know what it is like. I may tear up, but I am better than last year – sadness and joy are part of life.